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 Worried about Mom or Dad living alone 
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Joined: Sat Oct 06, 2007 4:28 pm
Posts: 781
Location: LA
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Post Worried about Mom or Dad living alone
Each time I read a story by a newcomer to this site wondering about a loved one who lives alone, it follows the same pattern... the parent seems to be confused, has had falls lately, but mostly are pretty much the same as they have always been. I would ask you to find a reason to spend a few nights with Mom or Dad. It is at night time that LBD comes to life. I cringe when I remember things that happened here at my home years before anyone but myself knew about the strange things. During the day, Mr B. was mostly the same as always except for wanting to have naps. He would tend his garden, whistle and play the piano in the daytime. Make light of his falls and say he stumbled or something. I gradually began doing the checkbook and driving and such because of his failing eyesight... we blamed everything on his eyesight. But just like clock work when the sun went down he began seeing strange people here, talking to them, inviting them to dinner and leaving the TV on after we went to bed so they could watch it and stay out of our bedroom. The loud, busy dreams, were every night but when we went to see our doctor Mr B. was a Past Master at "Showtime". Looking back I think Dr. W. saw more than we thought but until we were ready to admit there was a real problem there was not much he could do. I'm afraid I must have been in real denial, Mr B. could not have a mental condition, I enabled him to keep it covered for a very long time. He hit rock bottom a few weeks after I found this forum and we did get help...

When the "away from home" child discovers there is a condition that needs to be addressed, they usually think the disease has come on suddenly but probably Mom or Dad have just done a great job of "not wanting you to worry".

Unless you [really] know what your parents who live alone are doing each night, don't take their word for it. Go have a slumber party with him/her and I sincerely hope you find them sleeping like angels... but if you have come to this forum because you are worried about them, chances are they are intertaining figures that only they can see. The falls will happen. The medicines will be spilled and mixed. The stove will be forgotten and bills will go unpaid. But I hope not.

DrP

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"See this lady she's 85 but she's nice", This is the way my husband, Mr B., introduced me in 2006 to the people only he knew. Death due to pneumonia. Lewy Body Dementia diagnosed post mortem at Mayo Clinic in Jacksonville Florida.


Wed Jun 03, 2009 2:47 am
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Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 2:59 pm
Posts: 1978
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Dr.P,
You are so correct, if you really want a taste of LBD try spending some nights with them, you mention you blamed everything on the failing eye sight, me I blamed everything on the fact that my husband traveled for a living and couldn't get used to life at home after 35 yrs on the road and then I blamed the hearing loss, even when he was DX'ed with PD some yrs earlier, that day I said Oh Ok but shortly after that I found things that were not PD and started the quest agian. I guess it is bad enough when they start seeing people in the evening for us people were ringing the door bell, that wasn't too bad when it was a time I was up but it happened all night long, then the changing of the car tires at all hours of the night with no clothes on, I finally had to install alarms on the outside doors, I always worried he would feel like a midnight swim, which would have been nice in the day but not in the condition he was in !

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Irene Selak


Wed Jun 03, 2009 8:34 am
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