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 The Dance 
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Joined: Thu May 31, 2012 6:51 pm
Posts: 60
Post The Dance
Thirty-four (34) years ago today I gave birth to a very beautiful baby girl, my dear, sweet, Kathleen Diane Ricks (a.k.a. Girlbone). With her daddy's blue eyes and her mommy's facial features and hair color, her parents and brother fell head over heels in love with her. Like her mother, she had a beautiful singing voice. Like her brother, she had a fun, yet daring nature. And like her father, she had determination to accomplish things at times when one would not expect it (i.e., she learned to walk on the very day that Hurricane Frederick was causing the walls of our home to sway). My dear daughter went to live in Heaven at the very tender age of 2 & 1/2, as a result of foul play by someone who I thought was a friend. Today, however, as I think about the "dance" we shared, and how many wonderful memories our dance brought us, I find myself pondering upon the "dance" I've shared with and continue to share with my husband. As with Kathy, I don't know when my dance with my husband will end, or how, but I do realize how vitally important such dances are in our lives. May God bless us all as we treasure those we love, both living and in Heaven.

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Beth


Sat Jul 14, 2012 7:44 pm
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Joined: Thu Apr 21, 2011 9:07 pm
Posts: 247
Post Re: The Dance
Beth, thank you so much for this beautiful and moving post. My heart aches for you, to have lost a child, but your courage and love shine through even this most profound grief.

I saw a colleague/ friend Thursday for the first time in a while; she lost her 7-year-old son to an accident in winter, same age as my grandson, in fact I remember talking with her when she and my daughter were both pregnant. Hers was something of a surprise, quite a bit after two kids in mid to later teens, but brought such joy. It is a comfort to hear that you have been able to carry that joy in your heart, and I pray that my friend will have that same blessing, that even this short but remarkable passage together will mark their lives with love as well as sorrow.

As Friends (Quakers) say, I will hold you in the Light, and may your love sustain you during the challenges you face.
Laurel

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Laurel - mother (97) diagnosed April, 2011, with LBD; died May, 2014.


Sat Jul 14, 2012 7:53 pm
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Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 2:59 pm
Posts: 1978
Post Re: The Dance
Beth,
I too thank you for sharing your beautiful little girl with us even if just a moment in your post, May memories of her beautiful face bring you peace and you are right we never know when that last dance will be and we must live each day as if it were our last one. No parent should ever have to go through a loss of a child and I am sorry that you had to endure that in your life .
Special hugs to you today !

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Irene Selak


Sat Jul 14, 2012 10:08 pm
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Joined: Wed Dec 30, 2009 1:46 pm
Posts: 3213
Location: WA
Post Re: The Dance
What a poignant story, both delicate and strong. I cannot imagine anything worse than losing a child--especially to circumstances like that. My heart goes out to you in your many avenues of grief and memories. May your dance be a joyful one!

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Pat [68] married to Derek [84] for 38 years; husband dx PDD/LBD 2005, probably began 2002 or earlier; late stage and in a SNF as of January 2011. Hospitalized 11/2/2013 and discharged to home Hospice. Passed away at home on 11/9/2013.


Sat Jul 14, 2012 10:27 pm
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Joined: Tue Aug 30, 2011 1:36 pm
Posts: 48
Post Re: The Dance
LOVE the song "The Dance." I really had not applied it to my path with Mom. Thanks for that thought. And thank you for sharing the memory of your beloved Kathy. May we treasure each moment we have with those we love and choose moments with them over the things that would distract us. Peace to you, Beth.

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Donna G, 52, helped Dad take care of Mom, who died at home surrounded by family in June 2012.


Sun Jul 15, 2012 9:41 pm
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Joined: Fri Jan 15, 2010 9:33 pm
Posts: 3377
Location: Vermont
Post Re: The Dance
Beth, I cannot imagine the grief of losing a child - a parents' worst nightmare. I wish you peace, strength and much love throughout your life. Lynn

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Lynn, daughter of 89 year old dad dx with possiblity of LBD, CBD, PSP, FTD, ALS, Vascular Dementia, AD, etc., died Nov. 30, 2010 after living in ALF for 18 months.


Tue Jul 17, 2012 12:06 pm
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Joined: Thu May 31, 2012 6:51 pm
Posts: 60
Post Re: The Dance
Lynn:

Losing a child is the worst thing in the world to happen to any parent. Yet, I am finding that losing my husband to LBD, and then by death, is equally as horrible.

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Beth


Tue Jul 17, 2012 11:54 pm
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Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 2:59 pm
Posts: 1978
Post Re: The Dance
Beth,
It is very hard to lose a spouse, I believe over the yrs of marriage we just mesh into one being and when that loss happens we lose part of ourselves and with this illness it is a little each day. For me it has been almost 7 yrs and I still struggle with the loss , yes the blows get softer with time but it is the constant reminder of our loss as we head into retirement yrs alone, this is the one reason I think support is so needed for us!

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Irene Selak


Wed Jul 18, 2012 9:14 am
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Joined: Wed Dec 30, 2009 1:46 pm
Posts: 3213
Location: WA
Post Re: The Dance
So true! I miss my husband so much, even though I see him every day. What wouldn't I give to have him back again??!! :cry:

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Pat [68] married to Derek [84] for 38 years; husband dx PDD/LBD 2005, probably began 2002 or earlier; late stage and in a SNF as of January 2011. Hospitalized 11/2/2013 and discharged to home Hospice. Passed away at home on 11/9/2013.


Wed Jul 18, 2012 9:48 am
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Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 2:59 pm
Posts: 1978
Post Re: The Dance
Pat,
I know you do! Sending hugs your way !

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Irene Selak


Wed Jul 18, 2012 11:22 am
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Joined: Fri Jan 15, 2010 9:33 pm
Posts: 3377
Location: Vermont
Post Re: The Dance
It is so painful to experience a LO slip away a little more each day. Hugs to all CGs out there. Lynn

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Lynn, daughter of 89 year old dad dx with possiblity of LBD, CBD, PSP, FTD, ALS, Vascular Dementia, AD, etc., died Nov. 30, 2010 after living in ALF for 18 months.


Wed Jul 18, 2012 1:44 pm
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