Well, it's been a rough couple weeks.
After evaluations from PT and VNA, they decided that it's really not safe for mom to walk anymore. It was taking a strong 2 person assist to get her from bed to commode, and is no longer able to follow directions from PT. Since her pt was no longer progressing, they recommended hospice. She is now completely immobile, although the CG"s do try to get her out of bed into the chair a few hours a day. Her appetite is still sporadic, and speech is limited to yes and no answers (and I don't think they are always right...just conditioned)

How much longer can she go on this way?

Someone can last for months or years this way!

so sorry you are going thru this... i hope with hospice involved now, it will lesson your worries...
cindi

Has their recommendation for hospice been confirmed by her doctor? Have you accepted this option?

My heart goes out to you. What a very sad and painful situation for you.

My brother and I have accepted the idea of hospice. My dad is welcoming of the hospice services, although I think he's still in a bit of denial of the overall concept. Her primary doc had suggested hospice in january, but we didn't persue it until she was falling several times a week at the end of april. We had begun the eval then when she had yet annother fall and fractured her hip.
I just hope they can give my dad some emotional and cg support.
Thank you all ford your support.
Heidi

Hey Heidi, I'm so sorry to hear of your mother's decline. We are beginning hospice with my mom this week too. Prayers for our dads. Take care.

Hospice is great because they give a lot of support to family members as well as to the patient. We had a wonderful hospice nurse who really helped us understand a lot about final stages, which made it better for us. It's a tough thing to go through so having good support is important. All the best, Lynn

Heidi,
Just to be sure you know...hospice doesn't provide 7x24 or even 5x8 caregiver support. They do provide aides to assist with bathing, and many hospice agencies have volunteers who come to read, play music, sing, whatever.
Robin

Robin, thank you for the reminder. A lot of people are very disappointed to find that they won't be getting around-the-clock care.

Thanks everyone!
I am aware that hospice care giving is limited. We were very lucky to have mom qualify for 5 days of personal care for 90 min/day. I think what I am hoping for most from hospice is some social work support for my dad. I hope they will help him come to terms with mom's condition and prognosis and help him deal with that. He has always been reluctant to take advice from "the kids" but is very willing to listen to "the professionals". Even his primary doc said "as right as you may be, he will listen to hospice before you". I am lucky that they have a PCP who knows them both so well, and is concerned with both of their well being and quality of life. I have already spoken to the hospice social worker as well.

I have already spoken with the nurse, who was also the same one assigned to her before her fall. She seems to think mom is cognitively back to her baseline before the fall, which was great news! She is going to re-assess her for mobility this week. She seems to have her legs give out without notice similar to many other LO's I've been reading about lately. Because of this, the VNA nurse had labeled her unsafe to be mobile. I guess we"ll wait and see!

You have a wise PCP in your corner!

Robin, my parents have shared the same PCP for about 20 years and he is wonderful! He truly knows them both as people, not just patients. When i called him a couple weeks ago with some questions, he had so much insight to my dad's character and personality, and what dad could realistically do for mom. He calls dad to check in on how things are going.
One of the things in this awful situation that I am thankful for!

The hospice social work visit is today. Upon advice from dad's pcp I will not be there. He has a feeling that dad would be more forthcoming about their needs if I weren't there. Dad has a tendancy to sugar coat things "for the kids". I'll get the update from SW this afternoon.

Heidi - your dad sounds like a very caring man, very thoughtful of others, much like my dad was before disease took over. I hope things go well today. Lynn

Heidi,
I just sent you a private message before I got on the forum and saw this. I think my mom was where your mom is in terms of disease progression starting last January when she got a bad cold which we thought was pneumonia. I'm sorry to hear of your mother's decline. It's so hard to see, and it's hard to know how to best support our dads.
Diana

Diana,
I just replied to your message. Thanks for the insight! I appreciate it!