I hear ya, Dianne. I don't know how many veterans told me, when my dad first became so ill, "go to the VA. They will help pay for his care." When he died several of them asked me at his funeral about his VA benefits. When I told them that you have to have less thank $80,000 in assets, or you get nothing, they were appalled. No one at the VA seemed to know (or maybe they did but they never told me that) that except people on this forum, and I wish I'd known about the forum before spending all that time, energy and paper filling out the ridiculous amount of forms.
I wonder if they don't tell you certain basic criteria for receiving benefits, and that way more people stay employed just to do the "denied" stamp on our forms? It is an incredible bureaucracy. Only soc. sec. is as bad/worse than dealing with the VA in my experience. Lynn