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 the guilt a spouse feels after placement 
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Joined: Tue May 22, 2007 9:58 am
Posts: 6
Location: St. Paul, MN
Post the guilt a spouse feels after placement
Forum newbie here again, with another question. It's so hard for my Grandma to say goodbye to Grandpa after a visit. He does not seem to understand why she can't stay with him, why she can't move in, why they have to live separate. Thankfully they are only minutes apart, but due to extreme fatigue and her own health issues, Grandma has been told that she should not be there at the nursing home with Grandpa all day every day. She is SO sad, and while she knows he needs to be there, the guilt she feels is terrible. Any ideas on coping with that? I cry every time I leave him and all the way home, and I am just a granddaughter. I can't imagine how a spouse of 63 years feels!

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With Gratitude, Amy
Granddaughter, seeking information for beloved 87 YO Grandfather, advanced LBD


Tue May 22, 2007 3:08 pm
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Joined: Thu Jan 18, 2007 11:38 pm
Posts: 65
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I just saw your post - when we leave my father we don't really say goodbye. We usually say we'll be back in awhile. He seems happy with that - the caregivers in his cottage also come over sometimes and redirect him so that we can leave. My mom use to feel a lot of guilt but she can't be there - it would be no life for her and I think she is coming to realize that. But she goes every other day and she stays for as long as she needs and then like I said - she says she will see him later and most times it goes very well.

Kani


Fri Jun 15, 2007 8:34 am
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