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 my grandmother will not sleep in her bed 
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Joined: Thu Aug 18, 2011 9:24 pm
Posts: 5
Post my grandmother will not sleep in her bed

i'm not sure when it started, but my grandmother will only sleep on the couch or in her chair now. it seems like at a certain point in the evening, she starts believing that her room is actually her parents room, and she even refuses to step foot in there. i quickly found that no amount of explanation would make her understand why her room couldn't possibly be her parent's. during the day she (usually) acknowledges that her room is hers.

this wouldn't bother me except for the fact that she does on occasion complain about not sleeping well, especially if she spent the night curled up in her chair instead of actually laying down. interestingly, she has a grand total of three beds (hers, and two others that belonged to her children that are now for guests). i haven't tried suggesting that she sleep in one of these yet, because she'll probably tell me that these beds also belong to other people.

when she was young, she had a LOT of siblings, and she didn't have a separate room for a few years until her eldest brother moved out. its almost as if she's regressing back in time to that point in her life. is there anything i can do about this at all or should i just let it go?

Tue Sep 06, 2011 5:26 pm

Joined: Wed Dec 30, 2009 1:46 pm
Posts: 3213
Location: WA
Post Re: my grandmother will not sleep in her bed
I would buy some good bed pads [like the large, quilted ones] and just let it go.

Pat [68] married to Derek [84] for 38 years; husband dx PDD/LBD 2005, probably began 2002 or earlier; late stage and in a SNF as of January 2011. Hospitalized 11/2/2013 and discharged to home Hospice. Passed away at home on 11/9/2013.

Tue Sep 06, 2011 7:12 pm

Joined: Mon Feb 14, 2011 10:22 pm
Posts: 194
Location: Portland, Or
Post Re: my grandmother will not sleep in her bed
My mom also won't sleep in her bed. She sleeps in her lift chair (recliner) in the living room. Before she was diagnosed with LBD, she had two different instances of leg breaks, so she wasn't able to sleep in her regular bed, so we got a hospital bed for her. She has slept in it before, but not for a long time. She says there's a bar that hurts her back. I got her an egg crate pad, didn't help. I wrapped "the Bar" with foam mattress material, didn't help. ( The bar is nowhere near where she says her back hurts, by the way). I don't know if she just prefers sleeping in the living room so she can watch tv whenever she wants or what but it doesn't matter, as long as she's happy and sleeping, we just deal with it. :roll:

Ellen 60, caregiver for mom Marion 82, dx LBD Feb 2011 died April 11, 2015

Tue Sep 06, 2011 9:11 pm

Joined: Fri Dec 31, 2010 3:07 pm
Posts: 1039
Location: Minnesota
Post Re: my grandmother will not sleep in her bed
I occasionally sleep in my recliner, if I'm up reading late I sometimes just recline the chair and stay there. Sometimes I get up when I have an awful leg cramp, so my restlessness won't disturb Coy. Last night I retreated to the recliner because Coy was hiccupping loudly and with enough motion to rock the bed every few seconds.

I find the recliner a pretty comfortable and cozy place to sleep. (Though I do prefer my bed.)

I agree with Ellen and Pat. Unless it causes problems, make her preferred sleeping places as comfortable and safe as they can be, and go with the flow.

If there is some reason you really want her to sleep in "her parents' room" maybe you can tell her they are on vacation and they said it is OK for her to use their room while they are gone. You'll help her wash the sheets at the end of the week.

Sigh. You never know what behaviors you'll have to deal with next. Enjoy the ones that are relatively easy to deal with!

Jeanne, 68 cared for husband Coy, 86. RBD for 30+ years; LDB since 2003, Coy at home, in early stage, until death in 2012

Tue Sep 06, 2011 10:02 pm

Joined: Fri Jan 15, 2010 9:33 pm
Posts: 3441
Location: Vermont
Post Re: my grandmother will not sleep in her bed
Since the LOs of so many people on this forum seem to have sleep disorders even sleeping in their own beds, you may be in the same situation, so where she sleeps may be totally irrelevant to how she sleeps anyway. That's a battle I wouldn't get into. Like the others have said, get her as comfortable as possible where she sleeps and let it go. There will be other things that will take your energy, so save it for the next hurdles! Lynn

Lynn, daughter of 89 year old dad dx with possiblity of LBD, CBD, PSP, FTD, ALS, Vascular Dementia, AD, etc., died Nov. 30, 2010 after living in ALF for 18 months.

Wed Sep 07, 2011 4:24 pm
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