I urge everyone to get some kind of help, I know it isn''t always easy to arrange but find a way, tap into as many resources as you can !
Have family meetings when possible to discuss this and sometimes a plan come up with family being able to offer help, some churches have people that will offer min respite for a few hours, contact your local AD association, sometimes they have people that can help, call senior centers find out what others are doing, contact support groups, Whatever it takes!

The caregiver deserves this precious time if only a few hours here and there! It should be evryyone's New Years resolution !

Getting out of the house if only for a short time makes all the difference in the world. Gerry, I agree just when I am at the end of my rope I think of how I am going to spend my free time. It is what keeps me sane. Bernie

Leone,
I hope this works out for you ! Its good to know you will help you can depend on, when I started with a caregiver I believe it was 18 an hour and I can't remember the min hours we needed to use but I know it was 3 days a week I actiually think it might have been 12 hours a week, never used the weekends as my girls worked out a plan between themselves, which I am ever so thankful for !

Fran is a friend of Bill Wilson, and through this organization I hired my caregiver for Fran. Fran knows him very well, he is kind, has experience as a caregiver and most supportive to both of us. I don't know how I could manage without him. He is also very flexable. I dread when I can no longer afford him, which will probably be in July, 2011. I try not to look to far in the future.

I have a caregiver that comes for 4 hrs on Wed, from an agency, it costs 27.50/hr, if you do 5hrs it 25.00/hr. I send a monthly ck of 440. for a 4wk month. This is the second carer that has come, the first no longer works there. I sent her a Christmas card and told her to stop in if she had a chance. She did come and she said she would be glad to stay with Frank if I needed to go somewhere. I haven't been able to go to any of our Grandson's games so I booked her for 3 of them. We didn't talk money but talking with my daughters we thought 20.00/hr would be fair.

I wanted an agency in place for an emergency. If I got sick or were hospitalized they have many that could be put in place to cover 24/7 for temp care.

We're paying 18/hr weekday and $20/hr weekend for our agency caregiver. I usually only get 4 hours twice a week. The SNF he is in right now for respite is $240/day for a private room, which is their regular rate. It varies from one part of the country to another but all are pricey.

Kinda hit the jackpot, maybe. The home health care lady came today for 5 hours, which obviously meant I could go do errands without my husband making it more difficult and giving both of us a break from each other.

The bonus is that those services also usually include meal preparation and light housekeeping. I asked her (before she came) if she would make an easy stew/soup/casserole that would be enough for several meals, and I'd have the ingredients on hand.

She made us a stew which will serve for a couple of more meals, swept and mopped the floors, washed clothes and made the bed. Not because I was pressuring her, but at her suggestion. $21 per hour.

That must have felt like such a gift! The home CGs we had while my dad was still in his house were wonderful, so willing to do anything and come at any crazy hours we requested. He really liked them once he got used to them. It is such a load off when you get someone good just to do a few little things. Lynn

Gift? Miracle. I'm euphoric.

I encourage everyone to try to maximize any help to multi-task to make your life easier beyond the time they spend at your house.

I may get there, but for now, I don't want them to do any of my work. If possible, I want them to go for a walk, all our routes are at least a mile. I have Frank's lunch ready and all she has to do is put it on the table, she does clean up from lunch.

Our first cg stopped by the day before Christmas and offered to stay with Frank if I wanted to go out. I booked her for 3 times so I could go to our Grandson's basketball games. She's terrific, she can find ways to engage Frank with fun, silly play, he says she's crazy, so it's a good match .

I can deal with our daily life but I find I "hate" all of this when I'm not able to partake with our grandchildren, I'll never get that back.

Sounds like a few of you have found a caregiver that is going to work out, I am happy for you, everyone of you deserve a break now and then!

I'm in nw arkansas and there is caregiver classes given at an educational center. They provide a list of individuals that complete the CNA,PNA etc. classes and work privately. I have hired 3 different ones over time and they have worked out great. $12 hr. and you work with them directly. Also check with Area Agency on Aging and keep asking for referances everywhere. Mom is in a home based program with VA and the financal qualifcation have changed in some areas. I don't know how those of you with men can do it. It's so hard to move mom and she under 100 lbs. You really need to take care of yourselves.

I am the main caregiver for my MIL. Luckily she can afford an agency who provides the caregiver during the day. Since both my husband and I work, this allows us to both continue our careers. If the caregiver cannot make it, the agency is responsible to provide a replacement. It costs about $3000 a month, but that is still less than a SNF and we get to keep her with us for as long as we can. The agency will even provide respite care, although it will cost a bunch. So far we have not done a respite in the 15 months she has lived with us. I feel really lucky that we can continue to have her live with us.