Mom's on Namenda and Aricept, though she also takes Lexapro for anxiety, which she's been taking since before the LBD diagnosis. There are several other meds for BP and colagenous colitis, which she has also taken for years.

Kate

My Mom had a colonoscopy & endoscopy yesterday. Her anxieties are so bad. Panic attacks too. I really feel helpless now as the Dr. & the anethesia doc. both commented that for her age & so frail she was hard to put under. It took 450mg of Diprivan & then to wake her she woke up very easily. They were tense about her since her condition but unreal how hard it was to sedate her. How in the world is she going to make it in a ALF she will be driving them crazy. : ) I told the girl I have been dealing with that they will pay me to take her out. But first I have to get her in there. Getting closer. I just feel bad doing it. She is with us right now.
Gayle

Gayle,
Don't let the guilt get you down, you have to do what's best for your Mom ! Your job won't end at the door of the ALF, you will still be very much a part of it ! I am sure the others here will agree with that!

That is for sure - you'll still have a lot of responsibilities, some will be the same, some will be new and different. Even with your LO in a facility there is still an amazing amount that you need to do to support them and make sure their care is up to par with what they deserve and need.
I wish you all the best in making this transition. Many of us have been there. Please lean on your friends here for as much support as you want. Lynn

Leone, I've found that Seroquel will quell the anxiety, if not the delusions. But I've only given it twice any earlier than bedtime. It's just heartbreaking when he is so agitated about what he imagines is going on and I'm not usually able to comfort him because he doesn't completely trust me when he's having these delusions--just Capgras [he sees me as an impostor]. And I have found that he won't take 1/2 a Seroquel once his agitation has escalated. It seems to work if I catch it early. I may just have to ask the doctor if I should give him a small dose after dinner because he gets this way every evening, starting in the afternoon and, oddly, calming down by bedtime, even without any medication. By 9:00PM he's quite docile and very happy to be tucked into bed even though his bedtime meds haven't kicked in yet. The whole thing just seems to have to run its course.

Just an update. Mom is somewhat adjusted to the ALF but is still very weak,shaky & talks with a slur alot. But she is out doing some of the activites & going to the 3 meals a day. eats some which is good that the food taste to her at least. She still gets such bad stomach aches.
It has been very nice at home & hubby & I feel somewhat relaxed again. : ) Or should I say we have our lives back somewhat. i still feel guity though but she is at least communicating with others & being very well cared for. No more med arguing with her either. She does still feel panic at times due to her small room
but at least she takes her walker & goes out for walking . She was even seen doing a puzzle . So she is trying to make the best of it. But wow these places are expensive!!
Thank U all for caring & encouraging me.
Gayle

Hi Gayle. I'm glad that your Mom is starting to adjust to the ALF. I think the opportunities for socialization and activity are most helpful in keeping my LO's brain active. Over time, my family has been able to find a balance where we are able to live fulfilling lives while also spending quite a bit of time caring for my LO at the ALF. By caring I mean reading to her, walking the halls with her, tending to her needs in the early am and the late pm when she is most confused and the ALF caregivers are most busy helping others, taking her to appointments, comforting her during her hallucinations and delusions, finding all the stuff she moves around and putting it back in place, etc. As the CGs and the administration get to know her better and become more emotionally involved with my LO (and they become attached to everyone there) I find that they respond to the nuances of her LBD symptoms better. I also know that I will get a call if she falls or has a panic attach or if there is a medication problem.

Yes, ALF's that specialize in dementia care are expensive - for us, almost 6K a month. We will go through her savings next year. She qualified for the VA Aid and Attendance pension which was a lot of work for me to apply but has been well worth it financially. Eventually, though, she will be on medicaid or she will have to leave the facility. I don't think about the future much. I'm still living week to week or day to day with all the cognitive fluctuations. Good luck to you and your loved one. AnnieN

Gayle,
I am glad your Mom is adjusting well, sometimes they surprise us, turns out it isn't anything like WE expect.Sounds like she is engaging some and that's great , having your lives back also gives you some peace of mind !

Leone, what I didn't say (and should have) is that all the things I mentioned are done by a team. My husband is there almost every am and pm (he is unemployed). My sister drives 1.5 hrs from Seattle almost every Saturday to stay with Mom overnight. This gives us a 24-hr break. We hire a companion every Wed. evening and Thurs. afternoons. Breaking it up like this makes it doable and enables me to hold down a job. Of course, someone has to manage the schedule and coordinate the efforts and solve the more difficult problems and that's me.

What my family has experienced is that if we don't do these things our LO's condition deteriorates, she falls more and ends up in the ER or tears things apart in her room or has more anxiety attacks. Also, just the simple fact that we have different people coming to see her means that she is redirected and can switch moods. So we feel that this effort is essential to everyone's well being. I'm thankful that I have the support system to do this and I recognize that the situation can change at any time.

Annie,
A support team is very important, I had one also and I feel for the people who don't, but your right it does help redirect them. I am glad you get a break because caregiving can certainly wear you down!

Leone, With a little bit of luck the children that hide under our bushes belong to your women, maybe a DNA is in order.
Life is never dull.
Gerry