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 I am not a mind reader! 
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Joined: Tue Jan 05, 2010 5:27 pm
Posts: 146
Location: Fl.
Post I am not a mind reader!
It is so exhauting to have to answer my mom when she is having her delusions or hallucinating. She always tells me "You know what I mean! Or You just tell them, you know it. " I Don't!! I do not have a clue and to have to guess about it, let me tell you she will tell me real fast if I am wrong or she will bring it up again later and catch me in it. It is so exhausting! This is a all day thing. I think I have aged 5 years. I know by the bags under my eyes from no sleep! Anybody else get exhausted out there from this?

Tammy

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I Can Do All Things Through Christ Which Strengthens Me! Phil. 4:13


Wed Feb 03, 2010 6:09 pm
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Joined: Fri Jan 15, 2010 9:33 pm
Posts: 3113
Location: Vermont
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I doubt there's a person subscribing to this forum who isn't exhausted by this disease most of the time. You are in good company! Although my dad doesn't have lots of hallucinations like some of the LO out there, he is almost entirely unintelligible most of the time I try to talk to him. I just got off the phone, where he tried saying 2 - 3 sentences. I had absolutely no idea what he was saying, and it is exhausting just trying to listen so carefully and try to figure out how you're supposed to respond. Obviously a 2 min. phone call isn't that exhausting, but when I visit him I know just how you feel. The only thing I understood was "Mrs. Brown" (the only Mrs. Brown we ever knew died at least 30 years ago, so maybe he was hallucinating about her.) Then he told me had to hang up because he had to be taken to the bathroom (his caregiver had just answered the phone and told me she was just bringing him back from the bathroom.) Bless you, all you direct caregivers out there. I truly do not know how you do it.
Hang in there. Lynn


Wed Feb 03, 2010 8:36 pm
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Joined: Fri Jun 26, 2009 9:39 pm
Posts: 92
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Such fun, ladies!! I just go with the flow. I made nachos yesterday evening and Johnny wanted to save a few chips to fix the remote. :) I told him we could eat all those because we had more if the remote wouldn't work. Then he forgot and went on to something else. It's the times when he's afraid that make me sad. Like when he thought someone was coming to get him for his "trial." Just told him it was put off for awhile, and again he forgot after I just repeated it a few times. And then the times when he just looks so scared, but is unable to verbalize. Some days he can't say two words all day long. "Are you hungry?" No answer. "Do you need to be changed?" No answer. I just have to guess or let him be.
Judy


Sat Feb 06, 2010 12:45 pm
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Joined: Wed Aug 05, 2009 11:17 pm
Posts: 26
Post 
Tammy
My Mom hallucinates most of the time. I've tried everything from answering, trying to understand, visiting with her when she is asking things I have no ideal what she is talking about. After almost 9 months of this roller coaster, the last few months have been better for me if I just don't answer her at all when she is in this state. What I've come to understand is they also have (my Mom anyway) has auditory hallucinations as well as visual. So when she is asking questions and looking at me, she is not really talking to me. If I don't answer at all I notice she continues to talk and ask questions but doesn't notice I'm not answering. If I do answer her, it gets worse and she gets more upset and talks more. I've decided when I talk back to her and she is already hearing voices it just gets out of hand. But if I stay silent and just let her go on and on, she doesn't get upset. Not answering is not always easy because she can get pretty demanding when this is going on, so sometimes just to leave the room for a little while is best for my well being as well as hers. When I go in another room for awhile I will hear her carring on a conversation as if I'm still there but it's easier not to answer her and not get as worn out if I just take a time out. I've started using thoes times to read my bible or pray, for me that puts everything back to calm. Good Luck to you, it's a journey for sure.
Cheri


Sun Feb 07, 2010 2:48 pm
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Joined: Wed Dec 30, 2009 1:46 pm
Posts: 3173
Location: WA
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What do you do when he/she says something like: 'What's that guy doing over there?' motioning toward an empty space in the living room. Like an idiot, I say, 'What guy? I don't see any guy'. But last night I got the dog to bark at 'the guy' and shoo him away. Not sure if it worked or not, because 'the guy' was back later... :roll:


Sun Feb 07, 2010 7:30 pm
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Joined: Wed Aug 05, 2009 11:17 pm
Posts: 26
Post 
Mockturtle
My Mom is always asking if I know that guy or woman, or the person sitting under the chair - seems like she sees little people and babies alot. But luckily they don't frighten her at all, but in my Mom's case it works best to say nothing or even act like I don't hear her - if I answer her at all it seems like the hallucination gets bigger and bigger. Or if I go along with seeing someone then she wants to feed them or something - so it goes down a different road and starts to upset her.
It's odd you got the dog to bark at the hallucination, did you get the dog to bark at nothing or did the dog just start barking?
Once in a while my Mom sees her family who have already died. But usually it's strange people she doesn't know.
Cheri


Sun Feb 07, 2010 9:57 pm
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Joined: Sun Oct 04, 2009 10:18 am
Posts: 276
Location: Washington State
Post What is it, with babies?
Do you think it is just women, or anybody with LBD? This is a common theme with my Mom. "There's a baby over there" or , "Don't you think we should do something about that baby?". Oy Vey, I usually grunt noncommitently. She has recently started to hear as well as see her hallucinations. I hope that we can do something about them when we start Exelon, but we're waiting for a Dr.'s appointment on Feb. 19th before we start. I've noticed that symptoms get worst just before a Dr.'s appointment.


Sun Feb 07, 2010 10:17 pm
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Joined: Wed Dec 30, 2009 1:46 pm
Posts: 3173
Location: WA
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I got the dog to bark by jumping up quickly and saying, 'You get out of here!' Any time I jump up quickly and act excited, he barks. :D


Sun Feb 07, 2010 10:18 pm
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Joined: Wed Dec 30, 2009 1:46 pm
Posts: 3173
Location: WA
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Annie, my husband has been on Exelon for two years! :( Initially, it really helped his anger & agitation. I'm not so sure it's doing anything now. His neurologist wants to keep him on it.


Sun Feb 07, 2010 10:49 pm
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Joined: Sun Jan 11, 2009 8:17 pm
Posts: 104
Location: Arkansas
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My mom sees babies and children alot. sometimes they sleep with her. Lately she is so worried that she has some place important to go to. I find it best not to play into these delusion but say everything is ok, letting her know I'll take care of things. I also ignore the hallucination as much as possible. I reassure her no one is here now and I will care of her and leave the rest to me. "I'm grow up now,(58 :lol: ) you know mom, and I care take good care of things, so don't worry."


Sun Feb 07, 2010 10:54 pm
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Joined: Sun Oct 04, 2009 10:18 am
Posts: 276
Location: Washington State
Post Good Words, Laurie
I had not thought of them. I'll try it. My Mom sees children too. Mostly in her bed.


Sun Feb 07, 2010 11:15 pm
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Joined: Sun Oct 21, 2007 4:18 pm
Posts: 835
Location: Acton, MA
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Frank also sees children and we had a baby once too. It seems he's always upset with me because I neglect the children, leave them out in the cold or won't feed or bathe them. It's so hard to know, should you go along with them, but then, as Cheri said, the story goes on but down a different path. When he wants to go home, we did get in the car and he directed me around the block and back into the driveway. Lately it's been in the teens and I'm not thrilled about warming the car to go around the block. I watch some short clips with Teena Snow, she said don't try to reason with them because their "reasoner" is broken. I've been trying to remember that. At 1:45 this morning, I did my best not to try to reason with him that we didn't need to get up. But here I am but Frank did agree to lie down for a while. I guess I should take this time to take care of those children that I've been neglecting.

Take Care,
Gerry


Mon Feb 08, 2010 7:34 am
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Joined: Sun Jan 11, 2009 8:17 pm
Posts: 104
Location: Arkansas
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Gerry, I have found I no longer ask mom what she wants. She doesn't know anyway most of the time. I don't tell her what to do either or she will become stubborn. So I suggest: "why don't we lay down allittle longer" "here is a drink for you" "lets do this or that". Redirect as much as possiable because usually in a moment or to they will forget. I make the dicision I feel is best for her and then I offer that or maybe one other chose. I know it sounds sad or controlling but it also saves her and myself alot of frustration. Take care. Laurie


Mon Feb 08, 2010 9:25 am
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Joined: Wed Dec 30, 2009 1:46 pm
Posts: 3173
Location: WA
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Unfortunately, I have not found that these delusions pass in a few minutes. My husband fixates on an issue and won't let go of it until he's had his sleeping pills and is in bed. He wears me out.


Mon Feb 08, 2010 10:23 am
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Joined: Wed Aug 05, 2009 11:17 pm
Posts: 26
Post 
mockturtle
Thanks for the dog story, that gives me a good giggle thinking of the dog chasing the hallucination away. My Mom see a cow in the livingroom at least once or twice a week, maybe next time I'll turn the dog loose on it. :lol: My Mom has no attention span at all so not answering her about the hallucinations works fine, even if I do answer her she is already on another subject.
cheri[/img]


Mon Feb 08, 2010 10:28 am
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