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 Just hang on! 
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Joined: Fri Feb 29, 2008 7:02 am
Posts: 537
Location: MI
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do utilize all the help you can. Hopefully there will be meds that can help him relax (when Mother gets very nervous\agitated I use 1/2 a melatonin). Take advantage of any good times to enjoy and treasure.
Maybe in the future we'll meet in Colorado :-)
Sharon

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syt


Sun Aug 09, 2009 8:53 am
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Joined: Sat Jan 27, 2007 8:38 pm
Posts: 712
Location: CA
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Dianne --

You are amazing!!!! Lately, Jerome is getting testy and not very pleasant in the evenings and I can't imagine how I'll handle it if/when it escalates to the crazy accusations of infidelity, etc. Don't know how you all do it!

If things get too rough at home, re-consider utilizing in-hospital hospice or a hospice facility rather than having hospice come to the house. First, you can spend as much time with him there as you want, 24/7 if you want. But it also gives you the option of taking a break whenever you need, and know that he is safe. There will be instant nursing care available as needed if he becomes agitated or is in pain. A friend whose wife was in a hospice facility said it was an amazing place ... they would cook/feed her anything she wanted at any time of day or night. Her pain medication could be monitored closely, it did not sound very hospital-like.

The cancer dx must have been a shock -- can you look on it as a gift? Unlike LBD, you have some idea of when the end will come and how it will come. You will have hospice, friends and family there for the duration. You and your husband will be spared the "death by a million cuts" aspect of LBD. You can focus on loving him, versus worrying what will come next/when/how long will you be able to do this. To be honest, I envy you -- sounds sick, I know, but only others on this forum will understand ... the rest of the world would consider it monstrous.

We are all here for you for the duration, however you need us. And whatever choices you make, we are behind you 100%.

God bless you both ...

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Renata (and Jerome-in-Heaven)


Sun Aug 09, 2009 12:22 pm
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Joined: Sat Jan 31, 2009 7:21 pm
Posts: 172
Location: Ohio
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Dianne: thinking of you as I just discovered the lastest on your LOs diagnosis. This as been a most trying journey for you (to say the least) & I'm amazed by your strength. Also I'm so glad that you are getting all the help that you & your LO need, you deserve every bit of it. Be well & be strong. Dee


Sun Aug 09, 2009 3:48 pm
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Joined: Wed Oct 08, 2008 10:30 pm
Posts: 976
Location: Henderson, Nv.
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Hello all,

LO arrived home today..thought he was on his way to L.A. Asked the drivers if they would pick him up and take him to San Francisco tomorrow. He seemed happy when we put him in bed...in our own room. We made the room so cheerful even Scrooge would have loved it. So far so good.
Hospice spent several hours going over meds, talking to hospice dr., etc. They had changed some meds in the hospital. Gave him Ativan the past couple of days when he was combative...hit and kicked nurses. He has tolerated it well and is in a good place. They gave me a bottle to give him a dose if he becomes unmanageable. This chapter of our lives will end peacefully.
My son and I are dead tired from doing so many things to make the LO More later, cannot keep my eyes open.
Thanks and love to all for your wonderful support.

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Dianne C.


Tue Aug 11, 2009 4:36 am
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Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 2:59 pm
Posts: 1978
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Dianne,
Just know we are all thinking of you!

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Irene Selak


Tue Aug 11, 2009 7:13 am
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Joined: Fri Aug 11, 2006 1:46 pm
Posts: 4811
Location: SF Bay Area (Northern CA)
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MM -
My thoughts are with you. I'm sorry for your loss.
Robin


Tue Aug 11, 2009 10:20 am
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Joined: Tue Oct 16, 2007 11:27 pm
Posts: 84
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MM,

My deepest sympathy goes out to you at this sad time. Its seems that we are all part of a large family who share a common bond together. You have been a very courageous person and your posts have been an inspiration to all of us. I've always felt that when someone passes on we do not grieve for them, but we are grieving for ourself because we are left behind to miss them and remember how it was once upon a time. You have done an outstanding job in caring for your LO and I'm sure he is looking down smiling at you and trying to comfort you. Please take care of yourself we all care.

B


Tue Aug 11, 2009 5:49 pm
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Joined: Fri Feb 29, 2008 7:02 am
Posts: 537
Location: MI
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learned from my Irish grandmother
you cry when a child is born because of bad times ahead and you celebrate when someone dies because the hard times are over

sharon

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syt


Tue Aug 11, 2009 6:14 pm
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Joined: Sat Jan 31, 2009 7:21 pm
Posts: 172
Location: Ohio
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Oh dear! Dorthea welcomes a new life & MM welcomes the angels for her LO. All I can think of is that song (sung at my father's funeral) about the seasons of our lives........a time for everything. Be well MM. I'm thinking of you & hoping you feel the postive energy I send. Dee


Tue Aug 11, 2009 6:44 pm
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Joined: Fri Jun 26, 2009 9:39 pm
Posts: 92
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MM,

Just one more of us saying how our hearts go out to you. My tears are for you today.
All God's blessings and mercy,
Judy


Tue Aug 11, 2009 9:22 pm
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Joined: Sat Jan 27, 2007 8:38 pm
Posts: 712
Location: CA
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Dianne --
You and your son are doing a wonderful job -- please keep us posted ...

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Renata (and Jerome-in-Heaven)


Wed Aug 12, 2009 1:16 am
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Joined: Wed Oct 08, 2008 10:30 pm
Posts: 976
Location: Henderson, Nv.
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sharon-loved your Irish grandmothers saying...how apropos.

mm- I do hope you are okay and taking care of yourself. Your journey has been a long, tedious, trying one. Be extra kind to yourself...you deserve it.

Renata-I will miss my son when he goes home. Its been so nice having my "helper" here to do the extra heavy work...and to talk to and laugh with. It seems the chores are never ending. Tonight we made a list for tomorrow and its as long as the day before...and the day before that...when does it end? When do we read a book or just stare ouside while listening to music? We think we have things under control when a new batch of chores crop up. I am so apprehensive about being alone with the LO when my son leaves.
So far so good...LO ate not a lot but good healthy food...except...he never had a sweet tooth...now he keeps asking for..CAKE ..of all things :lol: Ate 2 pieces today :lol: Our biggest problem at this time is trying to keep him in bed..he is always trying to get up to go somewhere. Has to catch a plane, attend a meeting, get to an appointment, etc. busy..busy..with nowhere to go.
Thanking everyone for their continued prayers and support. You are all in my thoughts and prayers too as you continue to care for your LOs.

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Dianne C.


Wed Aug 12, 2009 3:37 am
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Joined: Sat Mar 28, 2009 6:01 pm
Posts: 101
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MM,

Please stay with us and keep sending us your thoughts in the carefully chosen, beautiful words I have come to cherish. And may the angel stay and protect you, as the memories of your husband hover around you as a blessing for all time.
With love,
Doris


Wed Aug 12, 2009 3:56 pm
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Joined: Tue Jun 09, 2009 11:11 pm
Posts: 117
Location: Tucson AZ
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So very sorry for your loss. I agree with Doris, I hope we hear from you with your wonderful words.Tears for you today and prayers for strength in the days ahead. I'm so sorry.
Lori


Wed Aug 12, 2009 10:59 pm
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Joined: Thu Aug 24, 2006 12:03 pm
Posts: 79
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Dear DianneC,

I'm thinking of you and hoping you can reach down into yourself for enough courage to continue the care you have always given to your LO. Usually I read the posts at least once a day, but I have missed some because I felt my LBD problems were nothing compared to all of you others, and I just shouldn't complain or at least try to be positive. I was able to get away for a few days after going through a huge problematic confusion about who would replace me but it finally did work out and I was able to make a reentry into the real world for awhile. The day I arrived back home a bad sore throat etc welcomed me, and with all the sinus trouble and the jumping back into all the care has wiped out the benefits of those few days. So for me it's onward and upward. I also learned of MM's husband death and so I offer all my best thoughts to her. And of course the same to all you people who are trying to cope. I'll be on the site more often now with thanks to everyone. Dinny W.


Fri Aug 14, 2009 12:19 pm
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