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Joined: Wed Apr 15, 2009 4:04 pm
Posts: 1
My loved one has declined to the point where we are struggling to care for him at home. He has become more delusional. Also, extremely difficult to maintain his safety as he can become extremely physically violent during some of his delusions.

We have been looking at various long term care facilities, but have been declined. Many claim, the lack of knowledge on LBD being the factor. I know, however, since he is a handful, this is indeed a factor in his acceptance into a facility. The one facility that would accept him is obviously one which I would not even take my dog. <Cleanliness, observing the clients, all show their standards are not high>

Please, we will take any advice. I would consider home care but his safety is the utmost of our concern.

Thank you and God Bless.

Sat Apr 18, 2009 11:21 am

Joined: Fri Aug 11, 2006 1:46 pm
Posts: 4811
Location: SF Bay Area (Northern CA)
Where do you live?

I would suggest you call the discharge planner of the psychiatric wing of a local hospital and suggest where they place someone with dementia who can be violent. The local chapter of the Alzheimer's Association probably has a list as well. (You can check online at to see if your local chapter has a list online.)

You could also consider temporary admission to a psychiatric wing of a hospital in hopes that they can figure out your husband's meds.

Please look over the Boeve "Continuum" paper on (do a search) to see if he's being properly medicated to treat LBD symptoms. Is he taking an AChEI such as Aricept, Exelon, or Razadyne?

Is he on any of the no-no meds such as Haldol? In some people, Ativan is also a no-no med. You can find a list of no-no meds by doing a search here of "Van Gerpen medication Phenergan" with author "robin."

Good luck,

Sat Apr 18, 2009 1:33 pm

Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 2:59 pm
Posts: 1978
I agree here , getting some of the aggression under control could go a long way in finding placement, also try looking into your local Alzheimers and see if they can make some suggestions in helping with placement.
Good Luck!

Irene Selak

Sun Apr 19, 2009 7:27 am
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Joined: Tue Jun 26, 2007 2:29 am
Posts: 85
Location: Jacksonville, Florida
My father was in the same situation. This is what we did.
1. Found a non-profit nursing home that we liked.
2. Took dad to volunteer so they could get to know the good side of him.
3. Met with development department and board members to determine where they needed help, and started making contributions to projects we liked.
4. Met with admissions and tried to make friends, so they could see that he was a nice guy.
5. Too soon, the time came that he was in the yard swinging a stick at the hallucinations and was taken to the hospital. The nursing home agreed to "try him". He was not a pleasant person, but the people in the special care unit were wonderful. Also, I hired around the clock sitters for a few weeks until he began to calm down. I sat with him. Guys from the church sat with him. Every time there was a full moon, we held our breath. (The agitation was always worse.) After about 6 months, he was given one more chance. He failed. They notified us that he had to go elsewhere. The only place that would take him was a state run facility, probably much like the one you described. Before he could be placed, he fell and cut his head, was medicated when he returned from the hospital, and "forgot how to walk". He has been in another unit in a geri chair for a year now, waiting to die.

This is not a pleasant situation for you OR the nursing home. They have to keep all of their patients safe. Imagine if your parent were a frail little lady and some other patient was yelling at her (or worse). I have always tried to approach this from the other person's point of view. Just be your most charming and try to catch your Lewy at a good time for the introductions.

If I had it to do over again, I would try coconut oil. (I have a thread posted here.) Dad is calmer and more lucid on it. If he were able to walk again, we could handle him at home now, which would make everyone happier. Unfortunately, his poor body has just quit and he cannot even lift his hand to feed himself any longer.

My heart goes out to you. I know exactly what you are going through and it is HELL!

Father has LBD, lives 400 miles away

Tue Apr 21, 2009 1:56 pm
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