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 getting a DR to diagnosis my mom's issues she denies 
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Joined: Tue Dec 31, 2013 2:30 pm
Posts: 3
Post getting a DR to diagnosis my mom's issues she denies
We suspect my mother has LBD. We have recently moved my dad out stating it is too much for her to care for him, which is only some of the problem. She blames my father for her present state stating the day she married him was the worst mistake she made, blaming him for all her present problems. ( not true). My dad is 86, (6 years older than my mother and was not sleeping many nights, not eating well, due to my Mothers issues). She has hit my dad once, and has been aggressive. He has been unable to handle my Mom any longer as she is having more bad days. My Mom refuses to get medical help but presents with many signs of LBD. She has been to a psychiatric ward overnight recently as she told an officer she was suicidal when they arrived as my Dad called 911 as he didn't know what else to do when she was acting out. My mother is very depressed. My Mom is very independent and proud and this make it very hard to get her help. My Mom will not tell the Dr her issues ( it is all my father's fault that she is depressed). When I bring up medications may help her she gets very angry. The Dr would not talk to me at the psychiatric hospital and her family Dr has been of no help. In fact when I talk to her family Dr, the Dr tells my Mom and then my mother gets very angry at me and shuts me out for a while, which really scares me as she is now alone. Her family Dr tested her and as far as I know thinks she is ok, she is not. I don't think I could get her to go to another DR unless a tied her up and took her ( which I of course won't do). I feel there is no help- but feel she needs to be treated. I could use some advise.

Wed Jan 01, 2014 6:17 pm

Joined: Fri Jan 15, 2010 9:33 pm
Posts: 3441
Location: Vermont
Post Re: getting a DR to diagnosis my mom's issues she denies
Do you have a local Agency on Aging or something like that? They may be able to help you by having a social worker get involved. Have you consulted an elder care attorney? If she is really that bad (and I'm assuming her symptoms ARE that bad) she does need help for safety reasons, if nothing else. Those are what I would try next. Remind yourself and your dad that this is the disease, not your mom. Our LOs would not choose to act this way (at least most of them wouldn't) if they could help it. Also, I'd get the pamphlets from the LBDA that you can give to her drs. so that they can become educated about the diseases, it's symptoms, and possible treatments. Sounds like none of them know anything about LBD. Good luck, and let us know how things are progressing. Lynn

Lynn, daughter of 89 year old dad dx with possiblity of LBD, CBD, PSP, FTD, ALS, Vascular Dementia, AD, etc., died Nov. 30, 2010 after living in ALF for 18 months.

Wed Jan 01, 2014 6:24 pm

Joined: Sun Mar 02, 2014 9:38 pm
Posts: 13
Post Re: getting a DR to diagnosis my mom's issues she denies
My father has pretty advanced LBD, but never saw it coming. It is all real to him. As crazy as his hallucinations are they are very real to him. His doctor has advised me not to correct him as it just makes him more agitated. The good thing about my father is that he is a good patient and swallows whatever medications he is given. I had to separate him from my mother even though they have been married 60 years as she couldn't handle the person he had regressed to. You many never be able to reason with your mother or convince her anything is wrong with her. I have been told by doctors that this is common.

Son of father with Parkensons and LBD since he was 75 years old. 4 years in Assisted living with his wife with the last year in memory care. Moved on to heaven just before he would have turned 84 on this earth.

Sun Mar 09, 2014 12:14 am
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